Trust

     "But I need to be able to trust you,"  my wife begs of one of the children as I am upstairs with my thoughts.  Isn't that the bottom line, trust?  We ask it of our children, our spouses, our parents, coworkers, etc.  Hell, we even want this luxury from complete strangers.  What is it about trust that becomes our go-to for building a foundation?  I think it all boils down to exactly what it most often affords, a chance to catch our breaths.
     In case you forgot, I have four kids....and a dog, with three legs.  Life is busy.  It becomes more hectic every second that I can't trust my kids to act in just a remote version of what Hilary and I have screamed at them to be.  Its simple, give me the opportunity to walk into the other room and exhale, or cry depending on the case, and I will live long enough to cook your fucking waffle at sunrise. See, we spend so much time being stoic in front of our kids, fearing that they may find a hint of weakness, that we forget to breathe a lot of times.  We need to breathe, to be fresh, when entering each whirlwind that the kids create. Trust is important between a man and wife as well.
     Lately Hilary and I have been tested by the ghost (so to speak) of my ex-wife.  She shouldn't matter but she does. We have to work so closely together that it's maddening, and that alone becomes a wedge.  Not to mention my wife's fear that my increased attention given to my ex is for more than our son. I wish she knew how much she is my world, one where my ex wife doesn't exist, a safe place  that will always be there. My rock, my best friend, my plus one forever.  She doesn't always know this but she trusts. She trusts in the two of us, not necessarily us as individuals, but together. Together we trust. Together we know. Together we believe. So that my friends,  makes me exhale.