Divorce

I am sure there are plenty of you out there that have had the unique privilege of going through a divorce. I sincerely  hope yours was amicable, if those words even go together. The truth is that they are closer to bipolar opposites, kind of like my ex wife and I were. You see, we had all intentions of making a tidy split (as no one these days does we thought) and rising from the ashes unscathed, just two best friends, coparenting a child. This, people, is a crock of shit...a fool's dream. There's something about separating that makes two people with the greatest of intentions mortal enemies. Even though we tried to plan ahead and even put a clause in our agreement about dating other people, I honestly thought it would happen to me first. So, as God laughed at me, I signed the forms and felt a breath of freedom at the thought of dating someone other than her. How bad could it be? Well, it got bad. Not only was I not the first one to date, my ex wife alerted me two days after the judge's ink dried on the agreement that she had "unintentionally" found a guy that she wanted in her life. That wasn't it ladies and gentleman, not even close. She then proceeded to tell me that after one week (true story) that they were so sure that they wanted to be in each other's lives that she really wanted me to meet this guy so that he could be around our 15 month old son. I can't tell you how unprepared I was...hell, I couldn't even swallow hearing that she was already serious with someone, much less that I was going to have to meet him... all the while envisioning this dude with his grubby hands on my son. I truly had scenes of BBQ's, with me erased, playing in my head like reruns as I pictured him leaning my ex back for a kiss, turning around picking up my son, throwing him in the air and then rubbing his hair while calling him "Champ". Yeah, ain't love grand? Anyway, I have to go so we will continue this later.